Fear can easily disrupt our ambitions and personal growth.
We often make excuses to avoid confronting what makes us uncomfortable, all to avoid that scary placed called “transition.”
However, the state of transition enables transformation, realignment, and progress. Transition allows us to evolve while making peace with the past and accepting the unknown future. Without transition, we would be stagnant.
Transition Enables Transformation
Below is an excerpt from ‘Warriors of the Heart’ by Danaan Parry.
It perfectly describes what happens when we embrace the changes we’re experiencing and the internal struggle that is our inner voice.
Sometimes, I feel that my life is a series of trapeze swings. I’m either hanging on to a trapeze bar swinging along or, for a few moments, I’m hurdling across space between the trapeze bars. Mostly, I spend my time hanging on for dear life to the trapeze bar of the moment. It carries me along a certain steady rate of swing and I have the feeling that I’m in control. I know most of the right questions, and even some of the right answers. But once in a while, as I’m merrily, or not so merrily, swinging along, I look ahead of me into the distance, and what do I see? I see another trapeze bar looking at me. It’s empty. And I know, in that place in me that knows, that this new bar has my name on it.
It is my next step, my growth, my aliveness coming to get me.
In my heart of hearts I know that for me to grow, I must release my grip on the present well-known bar to move to the new one. Each time it happens, I hope – no, I pray – that I won’t have to grab the new one. But in my knowing place, I know that I must totally release my grasp on my old bar, and for some moments in time I must hurtle across space before I can grab the new bar. Each time I do this I am filled with terror.
It doesn’t matter that in all my previous hurdles I have always made it. Each time I am afraid I will miss, that I will be crushed on unseen rocks in the bottomless basin between the bars. But I do it anyway. I must.
Perhaps this is the essence of what the mystics call faith. No guarantees, no net, no insurance, but we do it anyway because hanging on to that old bar is no longer an option. And so, for what seems to be an eternity but actually lasts a microsecond. I soar across the dark void called –
“the past is over, the future is not yet here.”
It’s called a transition. I have come to believe that it is the only place that real change occurs. I have a sneaking suspicion that the transition zone is the only real thing, and the bars are the illusions we dream up to not notice the void. Yes, with all the fear that can accompany transitions, they are still the most vibrant, growth-filled, passionate moments in our lives. And so transformation of fear may have nothing to do with making fear go away, but rather with giving ourselves permission to “hang out” in the transition zone – between the trapeze bars – allowing ourselves to dwell in the only place where change really happens. It can be terrifying. It can also be enlightening.
Hurtling through the void, we just may learn to fly.
If you are currently going through difficulties of change in your life, or transitioning to a new position, here are some helpful tips to ease the stress and make it an easier, or maybe even enjoyable experience to concur head on.
- Identify the specific fear: Understand what it is that you are afraid of changing and why.
- Challenge negative thoughts: Identify any negative thoughts or beliefs you have about change and challenge them.
- Take small steps: Start with small changes and gradually work your way up to bigger ones.
- Seek support: Talk to a therapist, counselor, or coach who can help you work through your fears.
- Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness can help you stay present in the moment and not get caught up in worrying about the future.
- Reward yourself: Reward yourself for taking small steps towards change and acknowledge your progress.
- Embrace change: Remind yourself that change is a natural part of life and can bring new opportunities and growth.
Sometimes life hands us challenges that we thing are too much to handle, when really, we just need to walk with the fear of change, and know we are going to come out stronger on the other side. The more you train your brain to operate this way, the easier it will become. I hope this beautiful excerpt from Danaan Parry comforts and helps you in your time of need.
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