The narcissistic problem in society is getting worse over time and I believe it’s because of a very simple reason. That reason is because people weren’t raised with the morals and integrity to be humble and do the work. If children are raised to be spoiled and entitled, their narcissistic parents enable this behavior by modeling what it looks like to have exactly what you want without doing the work to receive it. This expectation of others around you without doing the work yourself pulls at the energy of others and creates trauma in relationships.
Many people are raised in households where they are granted a sense of entitlement. Their momr or dad caters to them. They get to eat what they want, they have no bedtime, no discipline. The reality of this world is delusional in the real world as an adult. You cannot function successfully in society eating whatever you want, sleeping whenever you want and not working at all. This would be the equivalent of a child having chores. In the real world it takes work, diligence and consistency to create or build anything of value, including relationships.
There’s one common thread with all narcissists and that is that they have some sort of trauma that they have not healed from which hase caused them to become such a fragile, sensitive character. Narcissists have one main goal and that is to control at all costs. When they are in control they can manipulate and use people at their will.
Today we’re going to uncover seven key tricks used by narcissists to deceive you. Dr. Les Carter, a pHD shares with us today 7 tricks that are used by narcissists to make it look like you’re the problem.
7 Tricks Narcissists Use Against You
1. Bait Into An Argument:
This is one of their favorite tricks that they like to use. The more you argue with them the more to them in their warped mind it proves to them that ‘your’e unstable’ and they can point out that you are argumentative. Arguing also takes energy and if you’re battling your argument your energy gets exhausted. You’re emotionally vulnerable at their whim. Beware of people that bait you into an argument. They tend to invalidate and become argumentative. This lead to more tension and they feel satisified when they get you frazzled. It’s one of their favorite tricks that they like to use.
2. Insisting You Have To Justify Yourself:
They want you to justify your thoughts and feelings constantly. This is constantly putting you in a justification mode. Narcissists want you to continue explaining and going further and further into explaining yourself. They do this to poke holes into whatever it is that you’re saying. They get you to justify so they can poke holes in your rational thought or how you feel. You really don’t need to justify yourself that much.
3. Shame You For Independent Thinking:
Independent thoughts are a good thing. But narcissists will use this against you. In other words, you like to think and do things for yourself. They interpret this as them being left behind and out of the loop. Narcissists shame people for being independent so they will go along with how they want them to operate.
4. You are Responsible For Their Moods:
Someone’s mood and attitude is THEIR mood and their attitude. If someone says something to the effect of “I was having a perfectly good day before you showed up” or something along these lines, it’s a narcissistic statement. Your feelings and emotions are your responsibility just as my mood and feelings are 100% my responsibility. This emotional entanglement is a manipulative lie. You are not responsible for them feeling agitated or moody. They may also say things like ‘You’re such an impossible person’ and it’s all your fault. You should not accept that, because you accepting their mood as your responsibility is simply a lie.
5. They Offer Lame Excuses:
They may say something like ‘I have been under a lot of stress lately’ or ‘I am this way because of what’s going on in my life’ right now. They will then parlay this exucse back towards you instead of accepting responsibility themselves. They may admit something then say BUT you _______, fill in the blank, whatever it is.
6. They’ll Try To Intimidate You:
They may use intimidation tactics against your boundaries. They’ll call you selfish, or not a team player, or blame you for not going along with their ways.
7. They’ll Accuse You Of Being A Narcissist:
They’ll actually tell you that they’re the narcissist. They’ll say something to the effect of “I’ve been reading up on this online, and I think you’re a narcissist.” They use the very term of what they are against you.
It’s important to know that narcissistic behavior WILL wear you down over time. This will cause you to be negative, cynical and really working against yourself more than anything. They are gaslighting you. The more indecisive they can make you the more confidence they feel they can take from themselves, directly from you. The reason narcissists use these tactics and tricks on you is because they have ot have an adversary. What does that say?
They are adversarial within themselves. They have not come to terms with things in their life so they project their problems onto others. They are projecting backwards confessions about who they are on the inside. It’s important to be aware of common tricks that narcissists use to trap you.
You need to have your own sense of self-esteem and dignity in tact. You need to see it ahead of time and not play their game with them. You need to give yourself permission to be you. You need to protect and guard your heart, as one of the wisest men of all time, King Solomon shared. If you enjoyed this article watch the video and read the articles below: